Reconciling 1 John 5:14–15 Through the Lens of Loss

“This is the confidence we have in approaching God: that if we ask anything according to His will, He hears us.
And if we know that He hears us—whatever we ask—we know that we have what we asked of Him.”
— 1 John 5:14,15

A Reader’s Question

“I am struggling with these two verses. It says, ‘Ask and it will be given! So I  ask you boldly because I know your heart has done the searching. But how do you reconcile these texts? I think the words ‘petition’ and ‘hears’ may hold an  answer, but I know you asked, pleaded, that God save your daughter.”

Where My Heart Went First

This question resonates with something deep within me—the part that has wrestled, cried, and argued with it, too.

Those who have lost a loved one, especially a child, often find themselves caught between belief and heartbreak, trying to reconcile God’s goodness with an outcome that feels anything but good.

I don’t have all the answers. But I’m learning not to run from the questions — they’re where faith is learning to stand.

Understanding God’s Will Through Pain

Defining God’s will in the face of loss is complex. I understand the principle — that His will is good, loving, and sovereign — but I often struggle to place that truth inside my pain. Knowing about His character doesn’t always quiet the ache when life feels anything but good.

What Scripture reveals is this:

• Death and suffering were never part of God’s original design — they are the tragic results of a fallen world.
• God’s sovereignty doesn’t mean He caused the tragedy; it means He can redeem even what He didn’t cause.
• And His will is not that we suffer, but that we come to Him through our suffering.

So yes — God hears every prayer. But He responds according to His perfect wisdom, which often looks nothing like what I pleaded for at the time.

When I look back now, I can see traces of His answers woven through my continual healing — the people He sent and continues to send, and the ways He has used the pain I’ve surrendered to draw others closer to Him. But I’ve learned I have to be intentional about looking for those answers, because they didn’t come in the ways I asked for. Still, they’re there — tenderly stitched throughout the story He’s writing, quiet threads of grace I might have missed if I hadn’t chosen to see.

Knowing His will is perfect doesn’t always quiet the part of me that still cries, “It’s not fair.”

“It’s Not Fair.”

When I see wrongs go unrighted or outcomes that don’t make sense, I want justice. I want to fix what feels broken.

But God keeps bringing me back to a very familiar verse:  

“Do not say, ‘I’ll pay you back for this wrong!’
Wait for the Lord, and He will avenge you.” Proverbs 20:22

Waiting feels impossible when grief burns, but it’s the only way I can hand back the weight that was never mine to carry.

Because when I try to make sense of Annie’s death on my own — when I go searching through medical records or replay moments in my head — I’m not pursuing truth. I’m striving for justice.  I’m chasing control.

Letting go of justice doesn’t stop my heart from longing for answers — it just shifts where I bring the questions.

“I Need Answers.”

The word why is one of the first words we learn — and the one that never stops echoing through life.
When God doesn’t explain Himself, I feel the ache of being left out of the plan.

But I’ve learned to ask:

• “Am I really seeking understanding — or am I longing to feel secure, seen, and satisfied?”
• “Can I let His presence be enough, even when the answers haven’t come?”

The longer I’ve wrestled with the why, the more I’ve learned that peace doesn’t come from explanations — it comes from Presence.

What Does It Mean to Be Satisfied?

At Annie’s service, Psalm 17:15 was read:

“As for me, I will be vindicated and will see Your face; when I awake, I will be satisfied with seeing Your likeness.”

That word satisfied has stayed with me.
It doesn’t say, “I will be satisfied when I understand everything,” or even, “I will be satisfied when God answers my questions.”
It says, “I will be satisfied when I see Your likeness.”

One day, when my eyes open in His presence, I’ll understand. I’ll see what He saw all along.
Until then, I trust that His “no” or His “wait” is not a lack of hearing — it’s protection.

What It Means That God “Hears”

When Scripture says God hears, it means far more than acknowledgment.
He bends toward us in love.
He receives our words — even our cries — with favor.

“I love the Lord, because He has heard my voice and my pleas for mercy.
Because He bends down to listen, I will pray as long as I have breath.” — Psalm 116:1–2

Sometimes His answer is yes.
Sometimes it’s no.
And sometimes it’s not yet.

For me, His answer was gentle but clear:

“Cheri, trust Me — she is safe. She was spared from evil to come. You’ll see.”
(Isaiah 57:1 was the verse God gave me the day after Annie passed.)

The promise of 1 John 5:14–15 isn’t that we’ll get everything we ask for — it’s that we’ll never be unheard.

My Reflection on Prayer and Confidence

(Inspired by Charles Spurgeon’s Commentary on 1 John 5:14–15, Lexham Press)

“I’m learning that my confidence in prayer doesn’t come from how strongly I ask, but from knowing that I belong to Christ.
If God has already given me His Son — His greatest gift — then I can trust He’ll give what is best in every other thing I bring to Him (Romans 8:32).”

Spurgeon wrote that to pray without expecting an answer is to miss the point of prayer entirely.
We are expected to ask — it is an act of reverence. And it is just as much a reverence to wait for an answer.
“You wouldn’t ask a friend a question and then walk away before — or while — they reply. Yet how often do we do that with God?”

True prayer honors His faithfulness, power, love, and wisdom.
So I’m learning to wait — not passively, but expectantly.
To pray, and then watch.
To believe that He will speak peace to my heart — even if not in the way I hoped.

And when His answers come — in quiet ways or unmistakable ones — gratitude rises. Because once again, He’s proven that He hears, He cares, and He’s near.

When the reader wrote, “I ask boldly because I know your heart has done the searching. But how do you reconcile these texts? I think the word ‘petition’ and ‘hears’ are my answer…” — I felt the weight of that question.

It’s not an academic curiosity; it’s the cry of a heart that has prayed, pleaded, and waited.

And I understand it — because I’ve prayed those same prayers, asked those same questions, and wrestled with what it means that God “hears” us even when His answer breaks our hearts.

Over time, I’ve learned that hearing doesn’t always mean granting.
It means that our words have reached the heart of God — that He bends toward us, receives our cries, and holds them close.
It means He’s working in ways our eyes can’t yet see.

One day, I’ll open my eyes and see His face, and every question will fade in the light of understanding — and I will be satisfied.
Until then, I’ll keep trusting the One who listens — because being heard by God is already an answer.

 A Question for You

When you think about your own prayers — the ones still waiting, the ones that seem unanswered —
How do you reconcile these words?  That God hears every petition, yet sometimes His will sounds like silence?
Could it be that even in that silence, He’s already bending toward you in love?

Maybe you’re still waiting for your own answer, still wondering if He hears you.
I’d love to hear how you’re holding faith in that place.
Share your story or your words with me either in a comment or through an email — because sometimes, the very words you offer become someone else’s lifeline of hope.
Cheri@cherifletcher.com

??????? ???? ???,

????? ?.

I’d love to invite you to keep walking through these conversations together.
When you join my email community, you’ll receive Comfort in the Silence: A 5-Day Reflection on Walking With Grief — gentle daily encouragement to help you notice God’s presence even when words are hard to find. 
Join here